The Making of "Lonely"

 Join us on Instagram LIVE at 8pm ct tonight as we talk about the making of "Lonely!"

When I was in high school I was in a relationship that was so close to being great. But there was something missing.  I wasn't alone, but I was lonely.  I remember writing that down in my "hook book," I'm not alone...but I'm lonely. I held onto that idea for years and years.  As I entered my 20s and continued into the adult dating world I yet again experienced the feeling of being in a relationship and yet feeling so utterly alone.  From the outside looking in relationships can look perfect. But inside you're thinking to yourself...

"Is it just me? 

Cause everyone else seems to think? 

That we're everything happy people should be."

In 2017 I sat down to write a song with two of my best friends, Lydia Dall and Dan Kozlowski. Writing with really close friends is always easier for me because there's an extra level of trust there. You don't have to tell them everything you're going through because usually they already know.  Lydia and Dan were both there for me when I needed them most and I'll never be able to thank them enough for writing this song with me.  

I remember going through my song ideas and finding "I'm not alone but I'm lonely." Then Dan started playing a beautiful guitar part that fit the idea perfectly.  The rest is a bit of a blur.  I started crying and spewing my feelings, Lydia began crafting my ramblings into beautiful lyrics, and Dan kept crafting the music.  It came together like magic.  Messy magic -- at one point I ran upstairs at the publishing house and grabbed a roll of toilet paper and a trashcan because I was crying so much.  I think I might have used the whole roll before the song was done. 

Over the next three years, I started to play "Lonely" at every songwriters' round, full band show, and tour show that I played.  It felt like the song grew a little bit each time I played it, acoustically and with the band.  But with my band, I finally got to hear "Lonely" sound the way it did in my head.  

I can't thank my bandmates enough for co-producing this song with me. Thank you, Dan Kozlowski, John Townsend, Ryan Oetken, and Matthew Foss for bringing this song to life with me.  And yes! Dan is the same Dan who wrote the song with me and I think that makes it even more special. 

We first took "Lonely" into the studio at The Amber Sound in December of 2018.  This is the day when we laid all the bones of the track.  In 2019 we hit the studio again to lay the three-piece string section and piano.  In 2020 I finally laid vocals and it's finally ready for release! 

I've never been this nervous to release a song.  This song has been such a big part of my life for so long and I'm so excited to finally be able to share what I've been hearing inside of my head.  

If this song makes one person feel less alone, I'll be happy. 

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Credits

Holly Auna: Songwriter/Producer/Vocalist

Lydia Dall: Songwriter

Dan Kozlowski: Songwriter/Producer/Drummer

John Townsend: Producer/Guitar/Background Vocals/Vocal Engineer/Mixing/Mastering

Ryan Oetken: Producer/Guitar

Matthew Foss: Producer/Bass

Mat Poole: Recording Engineer

Alex Devor: Piano

Meghan Perdue: Violin/Viola

Maggie Chafee: Cello